How to Move on from a Break Up Completely
(This context is written from a guy point of view. Girls can read it from their point of view too). Can’t figure out How to Move on from a Break Up Completely? How long your relationship has been? 2 days? 3 months? 4 years? But, you still remember her? Do you miss those perfect moments with her? You must like, “Oh, I have had so many relations in past, but this time, she was truly something else, she just was so special.” No dude, it’s just in your head.
What else do you miss? Her smile? The conversations? The time you spend with her? You think she’s special.
Well, SHE ISN’T.
Now, understand this.
STEP 1: Accept that you made a mistake.
You think she is special, because she was your girlfriend, and because you love yourself so much, you think YOUR ex is the best. You are basically obsessed with your own choice. Your brain tells you that you are so perfect and intelligent that you can’t make a wrong choice.
But, in fact, that’s what you need to tell yourself that YOU MADE A MISTAKE.
Think logically, every guy who got dumped by his girlfriend and isn’t able to move on thinks his girlfriend was special. And there are millions of guy on this planet who haven’t moved on. So, clearly, there are more than millions of girls on this planet right now who are fu**king special. Stop letting your own obsession hurt your own self. And it’s completely fine to make a mistake because you are a human.
STEP 2: Think of her as a tumor.
She’s a fu**king cancer. Because only when you start thinking about her in these terms, then you really start thinking of not getting back to her. You don’t want cancer back. She is ending your life. Your soul is gradually dying, you are weak, depressed and drenched in self-hatred. Where does that get you?
Screw all those bullshit breakup songs that make you wanna drink alcohol and call her up in the middle of the night like a loser. You need to stop on your Bollywood temptations and enter reality. You are wasting your time.
Every single day you spent time in crying and regrets, could have been the day where you can achieve something, got a business idea, invented something, or read a great book that can completely change your perspective on life.
Be grateful! If she’s gone, the distraction is gone. And I called her a distraction because if she wasn’t, then she wouldn’t have left you in the first place. And because she did, it implies that she was going to leave you eventually. You just saved your years of being with a wrong person.
Go celebrate my friend!
Now, I know what you’re thinking. After this experience, will I be able to love or trust someone again? Well, it’s a good thing that you at least won’t trust someone blindly again, isn’t it? You’ll now be more cautious, observant and careful while inviting the next random person in your life. It’s called being MATURE.
STEP 3: Accept that she’s never coming back.
Deny any entrance of her in your life again. If she wants to come back into your life after a year or so, then what? Friend, she just lied to you or cheated on you or she just left you alone, even knowing it that you called her your world and she was everything to you. Be proud of yourself that, you were at least true and loyal to her. And that fool has lost someone who loved her and was loyal to her.
In friendship, do you keep inviting the people in your life who lied to you, back-stabbed you or betrayed your trust? No! Because you have standards. We prefer loyalty in our friendship, we keep people who are trustworthy. When you have such standards in choosing your friends, why would you want to be with a that random person, who in full consciousness just left from your life? If she/he didn’t feel any shame to lie, backstab or break your trust or do something knowing that it would hurt you, then it means just one thing, she’s a highly selfish human being. That is why she didn’t give a shit about you and when the opportunity comes again, she wouldn’t hesitate to do it twice.
Also, don’t ever ever ever ever get back with a person who cheated on you. If she could hurt you like that, her love for you wasn’t that real. There is no point.
Also to men who make their ex-girlfriend who cheated on them their enemy. Men who seek revenge. Dude, don’t. You are much better than that. Use your enemies only to make yourself more ambitious and to recharge your energy whenever you feel down.
Your ex is a piece of shit. If she’s your arch enemy, then you are a piece of shit too, which, you’re not.
STEP 4: You’re now wiser And Matured
The only person who is going to solve all your problems is you. Take at least 6 months off from dating. Experience the freedom of being alone after a long relationship. It is completely different from when you were single and never had a girlfriend.
Then, you were just a desperate, fooled-by-movie, romantic idiot, who thought having a girlfriend is the most important thing in this world. Now, you’re a heart-broken, wise, matured, experienced person who understands that the number of girlfriends has nothing to do with your success and manhood. You now understand that the relationships require a lot of work and time, which comes with the risk that you might be with the wrong person and your life can go in unimaginable wrong directions.
And because you are so dedicated to moving on your pain instead of turning into suffering, turns into a form of super energy where you can use it anywhere for your personal growth. Because, even you know it that, energy can be transformed from one to another. This pain will make you stronger and wiser.
STEP 5: You have to cut all ties with her completely.
If you want to relieve yourself of all the pain. You need to understand it won’t happen overnight. It takes time. You have invested months and years in this relationship, so the cleansing process will take time.
Now, this may sound like a loser. But, block her from all the place, so that there cannot be any exchange of any messages, no chance of stalking her profile and pictures and no way of finding out what she’s up to. When you do that, your mind automatically goes into acceptance. It starts empowering you a little by little every single day. You might have heard, “time heals all wounds.” Well, it’s actually not time, but your mind who heals it.
And it takes time because every single day your mind has to diminish and undo all the previous routines, habits and triggers that you have developed around that person and put new habits into your mind. So, you have to cut her off completely.
Also, a lot of guys call up their ex on because they think she is the medicine to their pain. You are in a depression and somehow talking to her makes you feel much better. Friend, do notice that she is the reason why you are experiencing such pain, which makes her a disease. And the same person cannot be the disease as well as medicine. I know you wanna call her. I know her voice calms you down and you feel normal. But, since that is not a solution, you’re making her a drug. By doing that, you are making things worse. Cut off ‘calling her on the phone’ from the list.
STEP 6: Focus on Achievements.
You need to understand that, by breaking up you have a wonderful opportunity to connect with yourself. Discover who you are without that person. Discover your own individuality. Focus on your personal achievements.
Ask yourself, are you in the position that you had always imagined yourself to be in at this point of life? What are the things that you could’ve done if you remained single? Because many times, people make disastrous and terrible compromises in a relationship.
It’s time for self-analysis.
Lastly, if a person leaves you completely broken and doesn’t give a shit if you are in a depression, why would you even want to go back into that relationship? You are happy and free right now, but you have to stop giving that control to other people. You should be thankful to God that now you’re on right track and at least not with a wrong person. Work on yourself and your dreams. There are plenty of fishes in the sea my friend. You will definitely get a deserving one for you, who’d be a perfect match for you. Also, don’t ever lose your belief in love. Love is one of the most powerful things in this world and it can do wonders if it’s done with the right person.
I hope you find this post “How to Move on from a Break Up Completely” helpful. Share it with your friends who are having a problem to move on. And also share your personal opinions in the comment box. My next post is going to be on “7 Steps How to Deal With Negative People.” Stay tuned by subscribing below.
You can do it and you will do it! Have a great day ahead.